Thursday, January 17, 2008

Target, Chess, and Twilight

Tom came home at a decent hour from school today. That meant one thing, we were going to go to Target. Before you judge me and think I am totally lame to take a family outing to Target please understand a few things.

#1. We do not own a car..we walk everywhere. This means even when I was nine months pregnant I still had to walk to the grocery store and lug them all home. Once when I was about eight months pregnant I was walking home from the grocery store. My homeless cart (that's what I call the wheely cart) was laden with groceries. As I was crossing the street my homeless cart hit a pot hole and sent my cart flying, and the groceries. They were all over the street. I had to bend over and pick everything up as the light turned green and cars started speeding by me. No one even slowed down for the pregnant lady in the middle of the street picking up her groceries. It was sad and pathetic and basically sums up everything there is to say about Jersey City.

#2 There are very few places with in walking distance. There is the Mall, Target, and...oh yeah, that's it. The Mall is totally played out for us. Target, not so much, it's about a quarter of a mile farther than the Mall so we go there a lot less. Target is still a Novelty for us.

#3. It's cold outside, and I don't have a hat or mittens. I had a hat last year, but I put it through the wash and it's completely misshappen and I wouldn't be caught dead wearing it. It makes me look like I should be pushing the aforementioned "Homeless Cart". I also had mittens. In fact I just bought some at the beginning of the season. They were a bright, cheery pink. They were lovely. I left them on the train. I guess I was overly excited about being on a date with my husband. We never go on dates. Finding a babysitter is more work then getting into the Ivy League and just as expensive.

There we are at Target. Walking down the isles, imagining what it would be like to own more than two matching dishes let alone buy new ones for every holiday like Target is always displaying. I stroll down the toy aisle with Haylie and show her all of the cool toys that I am not going to buy for her. I make my way over to the media section while Tom browses the video game aisle. Tom is the lucky one. He has a 50 dollar gift card. He won it during our New Years Game Marathon. He beat me fair and square at Chess. Why I offered Chess as an option for our Game Tournament I'll never know. I am terrible at Chess. I can't think far enough ahead to really succeed. Just to illustrate how bad I am at Chess I'm going to tell a short story.

I use to teach at a High School for delinquent kids in Tempe, AZ. Most of the kids had been kicked out of their regular high school and my class room was their last hope. In the beginning I tried to help the kids in my classroom. The pregnant girls, the boys with home arrest devices attached at the ankle, the girl who dressed inappropriately, and the kids that were never going to succeed where all in my class. One day I challenged one of my students, Marco, to a Chess game. I figured I would win easily. I figured it was a sure thing since he should have graduated the previous year and still had no hopes of graduating the year I was his teacher. Marco and I gathered the other students around the table. I blinked and it was over. Marco, the delinquent, who worked at a discount grocery store beat me in just three moves, check mated me in just three moves. I hung my head in shame and walked back to my desk. They didn't respect me before the game and they sure as H didn't respect me after my devastating loss to Marco. Later that year I was called into the Principals office because some of my students had come to him saying "Miss Pear doesn't give a S***t about us". When confronted with the statement I didn't even bother to deny it. I just shrugged my shoulders and said they were correct. I was quickly demoted to the night teacher and given a teaching partner. It's okay thought, I still received the same pay but had to do even less. It worked out for the best.

As Tom 50.00 gift card was burning a hole in his pocket I was searching for something to occupy my lonely hours at home while Tom is at school. That's when I found myself reaching for something scandalous, something I am completely against, something I have balked out for months, something that I'm almost ashamed to admit to. I reached for "New Moon". Stephanie Meyers sequel to Twilight. I was disgusted with myself. Of all the books in all the world that is the one I hate the most. I read Twilight when it first became the "it" book to read. I couldn't figure out why so many people liked it. It was horribly written, the plot was thin, and Bella was a disaster. Never have I met a character I cared less for then Bella. I found her romance with the vampire shallow and mediocre at best. I would put it just a notch below the trashy romance novels people buy at the grocery store. Now, all of those Twilight fans out there, please don't get offended by my distaste for Stephanie Meyers novels, there are certainly books that I love that you may not, and that's okay. I put the book back on the shelf and backed away, and bought "The Giver" instead. We walked out into the night, Tom with his StarWars game and I with my book, and Haylie empty handed and braved the wind and the rain for the journey home.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Jenny, as a fellow poverty stricken person I want to tell you about "project gutenberg". You can go on this site and look for books out of copyright and download them to your computer to read. It's not Stephanie Meyer stuff, but you can get a couple of Agatha Christies, old plays, Sir Walter Scott books, etc. You can find it at http://www.gutenberg.org/wiki/Main_Page. I can't afford to buy books either so this is what I've been doing lately. Love you and your stories!

[dene'] said...

WE LOVE TARGET. I can't get enough of that store. It has come A LONG way since I was a kid. Yeah what is all the hipe about "Twilight"?? I have heard so many people say they love it. I am not much of a reader, so I haven't. Star WArs game....the lego version? We miss you guys.

Jodiane said...

i love this blog. Cause i love the story about being demoted and loving it. Yes indeedy. Does it really matter which direction we are heading as long as there is a pay check. Hmm, I hope that someday Haylie gets a Target Toy. That is sad, ps. thanks for saying, "i knew what you were when i picked you up", yeah, i feel the same girl.

Carol said...

I do love all your stories. They are so great. Sorry about your homeless cart and mittens.

Jodiane said...

Jenny, will you call me, I am in a funk and need to chat it up. 570-7515

Erica said...

You seriously crack me up. You are so dang hilarious! I haven't read the Twilights yet, but I have to admit, I am intrigued. I do love The Giver though...hopefully that counts for something!

Dawnell said...

First of all, never be ashamed of Target as a family outing. We go there all the time and always love it. Second, I am constantly impressed with all the interesting things you've done in your life. I tried to tutor convicts at the county jail and gave up after one session. I can't believe you stayed with the deliquents. And third, I am a little disappointed you're reading New Moon.

Dawnell said...

I mean, thought about reading New Moon.

Jenny said...

Dawnell! I am NOT reading New Moon!! I was just tempted, for a second to read the book..I don't know what came over me..maybe it was a full moon?

Rhett, Angie, and Rion said...

Don't be ashamed for going to Target for an outing. Rhett and I always used to wander through Walmart looking at stuff, and that was when we still lived in Utah. I blame it on the weather. When you want to just get out of the house where else can you go without having to pay to get in? It will get better when it warms up and we can all start going to the parks again.
Later,
Angie